Sure people from all over the world are more or less the same. That’s why memes are spreading faster than chokers. I myself, without a tiny bit of exaggeration, can relate to 99.9% of all memes out there, the 0.01% exception is only due to not having a penis. But as much as we can all relate to similar things, there are a few specifics that only true Torontonians can appreciate fully. And being a proud Toronto basic comes with a checklist and a set of guidelines for conducting yourself in the 6ix.
First and most important, we all somehow feel personally invested in Drake’s life. Whether he’s dropping a new single or breaking up with Rihanna for the 26th time, we all jump right in and discuss all details at length, like he’s eating Ben & Jerry’s at home waiting for us to drop some wisdom. While there are many Canadian artists who made it big time, and a few from Toronto or near by, Drake’s commitment to the city stands unmatched by any of them. And we’re here to show our love right back. We feel extremely proud when he’s released yet another banger, not that we’re bragging, and fervently defend his latest album as being “the greatest of all time.” We swear off Riri for being such an epic bitch to our homeboy, but eventually forgive her because “Work” is still very Snap worthy.
In the midst of our transformation from T dot to the 6ix, we also developed heavy Toronto slang that we love to use generously. Now that we’re not just another North American city, but proud home turf to two biggest R&B artists and mecca of all things hip, we revel in our own coolness. Naturally, most of that comes directly from Drake’s singles: another song, another addition to our thesaurus. You will often hear woes, lit, 0 to 100, and my personal favorite, extra, to articulate any life scenario while waiting for your PSL infused drink at Starbucks.
We love pool bars and CNE, attendance is absolutely mandatory for any self-respecting Toronto basic. This year we made a third addition to pool bar scene with opening of Lavelle in the summer. While it might seem great to have more choices and actually making it past screaming bouncers, don’t get too excited: Cabana and Muzik are so last year, so the only place that actually mattered and was gram worthy is Lavelle. Whatever you had to do to get in has a strict don’t ask don’t tell policy. Trust, we all understand.
And of course your summer is not complete without a visit to the Canadian Exhibition Place. I don’t know what it is exactly that appeals to us so much about that place. Is it the old shaky rides or food concoctions that guarantee you kissing your summer body goodbye best case scenario and gastric bypass worst? But it’s a tradition and we must respect and honor it with a healthy dose of social media coverage.